A Ranch to Call Home Read online

  Finally, Kaye gave up, threw off her covers, pulled on her robe and padded into the kitchen. The chocolate-chip cookies she’d seen in the pantry were calling her.

  At the kitchen door she stopped. Gramps sat at the table, several cookies before him. He looked up. “It seems great minds think alike.”

  She wanted to laugh. “I don’t know about that, but hungry stomachs tend to react the same way.” She snagged a few cookies, poured herself some milk and joined Gramps at the table. “We’ve done this before.”

  “We have. You were a squirt and couldn’t sleep, excited about Christmas. I often wondered if you planned to sneak in the living room and see what Santa brought you.”

  Gramps and Grandma had spent Christmas Eve with them, then her dad and Gramps did the chores before they opened Christmas presents.

  “I could never fool you.” Those words took on another meaning. She knew in her gut Gramps had seen Caleb holding her this afternoon.

  Suddenly, her cookie held enormous interest. He waited, not pushing.

  “What’s going on between you and that fine man?” Gramps asked.

  Her head jerked up. “What?”

  “I saw Caleb holding you.”

  “Nothing’s going on between us.” She cleared her throat. “I was blue about Mom’s and Grandma’s appliances being hauled away. He sat next to me and asked what was wrong. When I turned to him, well, the tears kinda came on their own. I was embarrassed by it. There was no way I’d have cried in the service.”

  He nodded and she realized he’d gotten her to admit she was having trouble with the memories.

  He didn’t have on his sling and laid his hand on hers. “Joel and I know you’ve never made peace with losing your parents and grandmother.”

  She opened her mouth to object, but Gramps’s stern look stopped her.

  “I know your parents and grandmother wouldn’t want you to suffer that way. You need to make peace with those memories. And I guarantee you that if you do you’ll not forget or be okay with what happened. But you’ll give your heart permission to heal.”

  The words shook her to the core. A single tear rolled down her cheek.

  “Prayer, sweetie. God can do amazing things, but if you choose to hold on to the pain, it only hurts you.” He leaned down and kissed her head.

  Words escaped her.

  Gramps paused at the doorway. “By the way, I like Caleb. You can trust him.”

  His words only added to her turmoil. In the tumult she was going through, Caleb seemed to be an anchoring force. And she often found herself thinking of him, wondering what he’d think of this or that. The man had crept into her consciousness and burrowed himself into her heart.

  * * *

  Caleb woke with a jerk. The dream had been of his mother, brother and him standing around his father’s grave, his mother crying, leaning on Sawyer. Kaye had been there, strong and silent, looking at him.

  He took several deep breaths and swung his legs over the side of the bunk, running his hands through his hair. He slipped on his jeans and running shoes, opened the door to his trailer and sat on the steps.

  Maybe it was seeing Kaye losing it this afternoon over her mother’s things. He felt her pain. He hadn’t felt that connection with another woman, and it scared him. Love. A lot was said about it, sung about it, written about it. But he hadn’t seen what he considered the kind of love that the Bible talks about.

  Caleb knew Kaye struggled with what happened to her and with her parents’ deaths, but she didn’t put it on display for others. She’d snapped out of her grief this afternoon before anyone could say anything and went on.

  The soft breeze blew over his skin, much like a soothing hand of God.

  Caleb walked into the barn and moved to the stall housing Razor. He stood there watching his horse sleep. After Sawyer, Razor was his best friend. They’d been through a lot of rodeos and had traveled the roads all over the West together.

  Razor woke and turned to Caleb.

  “Hey, fellow. I didn’t mean to wake you.” Caleb ran his hands over the horse’s neck. “But I needed an old friend to talk to.” The smoothness and warmth of Razor’s coat brought comfort to his heart. He sat on the stool in front of Razor’s stall.

  When he’d talked to Joel earlier, that was the first time he’d told anyone about his secret desire to buy a ranch. What would it be like to wake up every day in the same place, to be surrounded by a wife and children? Was that possible for him?

  Caleb knew he didn’t want a woman like his mom. She couldn’t make a decision without a man’s input. After their dad had died, she’d changed into someone he didn’t recognize. She’d gone from consulting Sawyer and him to pinning her hopes and decisions on her boyfriends—lots of boyfriends. She’d become needy and had deliberately turned a blind eye to the abuse her boyfriends had heaped on her sons.

  A couple of the ladies he’d met in the rodeo had echoes of his mother, and he’d wanted nothing to do with them. He wanted a woman who could stand on her own. Kaye fell into that category, but she had her own problems plaguing her and probably didn’t want to work sunup to sundown building a ranch. She hadn’t stayed here.

  But she was running. Joel had told him that.

  Razor leaned over the half door of the stall and nipped his hair. “And you like Kaye, too, don’t you, boy?” He reached up and patted the horse’s neck. “You have any other input?”

  Razor nodded his head.

  “That doesn’t help.” Caleb shook his head. So much was in flux. His life was uncertain as of this moment. Kaye thought she might go for a counseling certificate, but her life was in as much chaos as his.

  “Lord, I need some direction here.”

  He walked out of the barn to his trailer. The moon low on the horizon shone through some thin cirrus clouds, creating a ring around it. A prayer rose to his lips, and he prayed for Kaye. And he prayed for his mother. She no longer answered her sons’ calls, and she’d moved away with one of her boyfriends to parts unknown. Neither he nor Sawyer knew where their mother was or how to contact her.

  “Lord, I don’t know where my mom is, but You do. Surround her with Your grace.”

  He walked back to his trailer, slipped off his shoes and jeans and climbed back into bed. Tomorrow he’d make a list of the things he needed to do to organize his part of the rodeo. Talking to Jack Murphy about providing the stock was priority number one. He came up with a list of eight other things, but the last thing that floated through his mind was how blue Kaye’s eyes were.

  He was for sure in trouble.

  Chapter Seven

  When Joel, Caleb and Kaye arrived home after another rodeo meeting the next day, the rest of the work on the house had been completed.

  Gramps walked out on the porch. “It’s all done. We have a porch roof, and there are new outlets in the bathroom.”

  Kaye held up the sack of food from the new barbecue restaurant in town. “We brought dinner.” Exhausted from the day’s meeting, they’d opted to pick up dinner instead of taking advantage of the new kitchen. They filed into the kitchen and worked together to get the meal on the table.

  “How’d the meeting go?” Gramps asked, snatching a piece of fried okra.

  “Everything’s on track, Gramps,” Kaye answered.

  “We have six entrants in each event and decided to add a round of ‘pin the calf’ between the judges and county workers. The mayor, who invited himself to the meeting, liked the idea,” Joel added.

  Gramps stole another piece of fried okra. Kaye started to complain but caught Caleb joining Gramps in snatching some okra.

  They settled down to eat.

  After the blessing, Gramps said, “So Asa’s going to be chasing a calf around the infield of the stadium? That’s enough to have the entire cou
nty buy tickets to see that spectacle. The man’s too old to be acting like a teenager.”

  Kaye choked on a piece of roll. Her gaze flew to Caleb’s. He hid his grin behind his coffee. Joel shrugged.

  Gramps’s bruises were fading nicely. His face held a sickly yellow tinge, the last color a bruise turns before it heals. He wore his sling tonight, and she wondered if he had been doing things today, using his arm in ways he shouldn’t have. “Did I see apple pie?” Gramps asked.

  “Nan brought apple pie to the board meeting,” Kaye explained.

  “You mean she brought apple pies for each member of the board?” Gramps looked around. Joel found the pieces of barbecue on his plate interesting.

  Kaye and Caleb exchanged grins. Nan had caught Joel after the meeting and given him the pie. The look on her brother’s face was priceless.

  Kaye gathered up her grandfather’s plate and put it in the dishwasher.

  “Nan sure knows how to bake,” Caleb teased.

  “Then you court her,” Joel shot back.

  “I would, but she ignored me. She only had eyes for you.”

  “That’s true, Joel.” Kaye snickered.

  Joel scowled.

  “I’ll say this about Nan.” Kaye was enjoying herself. “She’s got all those booths organized. And I can’t believe how the rodeo’s caught on. Why, it’s spreading like wildfire.”

  “Laurie was responsible for that. She’s got the thing all over the internet and Facebook. I wouldn’t have thought of that.” Joel took the last bite of his pie. After he swallowed, he licked the fork.

  “You sure you don’t want to reconsider Nan?” Caleb asked.

  Joel didn’t take the joke well. “Why don’t we discuss the trip to Fort Worth tomorrow? Sis can drop us off at the coliseum and we can look at the stock, then she can do her errands and pick up what she needs for the rodeo.”

  “I also want to go by the college.”

  The men at the table looked at her. “What are you thinking, Sis?”

  “Yeah, I want to know, too,” Gramps added.

  She explained about getting her counseling certification.

  Gramps grinned. “I think you’ve got a Jim Dandy idea. You know my friend Marvin? His grandson came back from Afghanistan and isn’t doing well. He’s drinking and Marvin doesn’t know what to do. When we came back from Korea, there were a few guys who had problems, but it wasn’t talked about. It was swept under the rug. But now it seems our soldiers are suffering and we can’t let them down. I’d be proud to have you helping those men and women.”

  She looked at her brother and Caleb. Both echoed Gramps’s attitude. Caleb’s expression particularly touched her. He knew about her flashback, but his attitude seemed to be go for it.

  “So once we do morning chores, why don’t we drive into Fort Worth after we have breakfast in Peaster to check in with folks and make sure they don’t need anything?”

  “You could call them on your cell,” Kaye offered.

  Joel gave her a long look. “Obviously, Sis, you’ve been away too long. Cowboys prefer face-to-face.”

  “The new phones have—”

  “Trust me. It will be better if we do it in person. I might be able to convince a couple folks to help.”

  “Who?”

  Joel just grinned like a Cheshire cat. “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

  That wasn’t her area of expertise.

  * * *

  The next morning, after they finished breakfast at the Country Kitchen Café, Joel, Gramps and Kaye went to talk to the mayor while Caleb walked to the feed store the next street over from the café. The old building, built in the fifties, had a big warehouse behind the front office.

  “Morning,” the owner called out.

  “Hey, Ron.”

  “Joel need something for the ranch?”

  Caleb knew all the shopkeepers in town. With his frequent visits to Peaster and Joel’s introducing him around, he’d come to think of this town as his second home. “Nope. I wanted to talk to you about maybe helping the stock supplier who is providing the animals for the rodeo. I was wondering if you could work something out with your suppliers to donate some of what he’ll need.”

  Ron rubbed his chin as he considered the request. “I like that idea. I’m thinking my suppliers might go for that. ’Course, they might want to use it in some publicity. That a problem?”

  “No, and I’m sure Kaye will credit the companies who help out. And I’ll be happy to defray any expenses you have.” Caleb didn’t like the idea of Ron being out a lot of money. They were all struggling at this point.

  “My thanks. Let’s see what we can do.”

  “Deal.” Caleb offered his hand.

  Ron shook it. “I’ll say that having Joel’s sister home, well, she’s gotten this thing together, hasn’t she?”

  “Yeah, Kaye’s something.”

  “Kaye?”

  “I think she got used to going by her last name in the army, so she told me she wants to use Kaye.”

  Ron nodded. “I can understand that. It shocked this whole town when that drunk driver hit her folks head-on, killing her mom, dad and grandma. Br—Kaye and her grandfather were in the car following and saw everything.

  “That accident changed her. I was in her class, and when she came back to school, she was a different girl, remote, like she was in another world. She never laughed or cracked a smile the rest of our senior year. She didn’t bother with senior prom, and the morning after we graduated, when the rest of us were just waking up from all the parties, she was at the recruiter’s office in Fort Worth, signing up. I don’t know when she left for basic training, but we didn’t see her after graduation. I never thought she’d come home.”

  “Sometimes our lives take unexpected turns.” Caleb knew firsthand.

  “I’m glad she’s home and organizing this rodeo.”

  The bell on the shop rang and Kaye stepped in. “Hey, Ron,” Kaye called out.

  The man lit up. “Welcome home.”

  “Thank you. Caleb, Joel is in the truck with the motor running and you know how my brother is.”

  With a quick goodbye, they raced to the truck. As they drove into Fort Worth, Ron’s words rolled around in Caleb’s head. Joel had shared some details of what it was like when he came home after the accident, but Ron had colored the full picture for him. Caleb understood how it was to leave the old behind and begin anew.

  As he learned more about Kaye, he discovered echoes of his life in hers, finding common ground. And new feelings started sprouting everywhere he turned. But he knew they were useless because there were too many hurdles in both his and Kaye’s lives to hope for anything between them but friendship. But hope sometimes doesn’t know hurdles.

  * * *

  “You be careful with my truck, Sis.” Joel leaned in the driver’s-side window, shaking his finger at her.

  “You best ought to pull that finger back unless you’d like it broken.” Men and their trucks. “I’ve driven a tank and a two-and-a-half ton cargo truck and a Humvee, so your little truck will not be a problem.”

  Gramps and Caleb snickered behind Joel. Out of the corner of her eye, Kaye saw Caleb grinning. When Joel turned around, the humor on Caleb’s face disappeared.

  “Well, those were the army’s, but this is my baby.” He tried to be stern but sounded like an eight-year-old warning another kid not to mess with his toy truck. “And you’ve been known not to be too careful with my things.”

  “Wow, who would’ve thought you carried around that incident with your good shirt for all these years. I was twelve.” She threw a grin over his shoulder at her grandfather. “I promise to be careful with your baby.”

  Joel didn’t look convinced.

  “Chill out.” She
blew her brother a kiss and put the truck in gear and drove off.

  It amazed her how healing just seeing the city of Fort Worth was. The trees were budding out in fresh green and the city had planted tulip bulbs and crocus in the median. A thousand shades of green surrounded her, so unlike the landscape of Iraq.

  Cowboys. Cows. Horses. Home.

  The familiar seemed to say remember me? She did, but could it be the way it was years ago?

  No. Too many things had happened, but could she live here with the wounds and scars she now carried, inside and out? She wouldn’t be wearing shorts anytime soon. Ugly, puckered scars crisscrossed her legs and abdomen.

  The drive to the university only took her ten minutes. As she found a place to park, she prayed that God would guide her. She wasn’t sure this was what she wanted to do, but it was the first step on the journey.

  She’d gone online to check out the program the university offered and learned the name of the woman in charge of the certification. She found her office in one of the older buildings on campus. The plaque on the door said Tina Linton. A pretty blonde sat behind a beat-up desk. Kaye knocked on the door frame.

  The woman looked up. “May I help you?”

  “I was looking for Ms. Linton. I wanted to talk about what it would take to get my counseling certificate.”

  The woman leaned back in her chair. “Well, you’re at the right place. I’m Tina Linton. What kind of counseling do you want to do, and what sort of degree do you already have?”

  “I want to counsel soldiers coming back from Iraq and Afghanistan and help them readjust to life as a civilian.”

  “What qualifications do you have thus far so I can steer you in the right direction?” Tina asked.

  “Well, I have a double major in social work/psychology and business.”

  “Once we get your transcripts I’ll know better what you need, but what makes you want to go into that specialized field?”

  “I’m an ex-soldier who has spent the last year in the hospital recovering from the wounds I suffered when a suicide bomber blew himself up in the café where I was meeting some local women.”